six word autobiography: “fuck goddamnit i fucked up so bad”
guys i specifically made that sentence seven words long so someone could comment “but thats seven words” and i could say “fuck i did it again i fucked up” so we could all have a good laugh but no one said it. yall fucked up. i fucked up because i assumed yall wouldnt fuck up. everythings fucked up
i’M READING ABOUT GOATS IN MYTHOLOGY/FOLKLORE AND I FOUND OUT IN THE MIDDLE AGES GOATS ‘WERE SAID TO WHISPER LEWD SENTENCES IN THE EARS OF SAINTS’ AND I JUST
NOW IT ALL MAKES SENSE
I was wondering when people were going to realize that “you breed with the mouth of a goat” means “you talk dirty when you fuck.”
what does a tree do when it wants to leave
GOD FUCKING DAMMIT I RUINED THE WHOLE FUCKING JOKE IT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE ‘WHAT DOES A TREE DO WnHEN IT WANTS TO GO HOME’ I CANT EVEN TELL A JOKE RIGHT WOW THATS JUST PATHETIC
Somehow this version is funnier.
Can we talk about how Anne Hathaway’s husband Adam Shulman looks a bit like William Shakespeare… who had a wife named Anne Hathaway?
damn the illuminati’s not even trying anymore
I guess you could say that when Anne hath a Will, Anne Hathaway
okay I have to reblog for that pun